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KILGHRARRAH
In a land of myth and a time of magic, the destiny of a great kingdom rests on the shoulders of a young boy. His name: Merlin.

--

[00:12, DEVLIN'S STORE]

VALIANT
I understand you have a shield for me.

[The merchant, Devlin, motions for him to come behind the counter.]

DEVLIN
With your swordcraft and this shield, I guarantee you'll win.

VALIANT
Show me how it works.

DEVLIN
Certainly. Tharanai im bis entra ofra honra stolle.
[The painted snakes on the shield come to life and slither out of the shield.]
When you're competing in the tournament, you pin your opponent under the shield, a snake strikes. Your opponent will be paralyzed.
[Devlin hands him the shield.]
The snakes are now under your command. They'll do anything that you tell them to do.

VALIANT
Anything?

DEVLIN
Just say the word. [They both laugh.]

VALIANT
Kill him.

[A snake darts out from the shield and strikes Devlin.]

--

[EXT. CAMELOT - DAY]

[Valiant rides for Camelot and places his helmet and seal on the registration table.]

VALIANT
Knight Valiant of the Western Isles. I'm here for the tournament.

STEWARD
Welcome to Camelot.

--

[OPENING CREDITS]

--

[02:26, EXT. CAMELOT CASTLE RAMPARTS - DAY]

ARTHUR
Ready?

MERLIN
Would it make any difference if I said no?

ARTHUR
Not really.

[Merlin draws his sword. Arthur attacks.]

ARTHUR
Body. Shield. Body. Shield.

MERLIN
Shield.

ARTHUR
Head.

MERLIN
Head? Ow.

ARTHUR
Come on, Merlin. You're not even trying.

[Arthur tags Merlin in the back.]

MERLIN
Ow! I am.

ARTHUR
Once more.

MERLIN
Oh, no.

ARTHUR
To the left. To the right. And left. Head.

MERLIN
Ow!

ARTHUR
Come on, Merlin! I've got a tournament to win.

MERLIN
Can we stop now, please? Ow! Shield. Body.

ARTHUR
Shield.

MERLIN
Shield. Ah.

[Arthur hits him on the head.]

MERLIN
Ow.

[Merlin topples over backwards and his helmet rolls off.]

ARTHUR
You're braver than you look. Most servants collapse after the first blow.

MERLIN
Is it over?

ARTHUR
That was just the warm up. How's your mace work coming along?

[Arthur swings a mace over his head.]

MERLIN [sighs]

--

[03:24, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS [chuckles]
So, how was your first day as Arthur's servant?

[Merlin taps his head.]

MERLIN
Do you hear clanging?

[Merlin sits at the table wearing his tunic. Gaius massages Merlin's shoulders.]

MERLIN
Ah! It was horrible and I've still got to learn all about tournament etiquette by the morning. Onhríne achtung bregdan!

[After he casts a spell, a book slides to Merlin on the table and opens up.]

GAIUS
Oi! [He slaps the back of Merlin's head.] What've I told you about using magic like this?

MERLIN
If I could actually feel my arms, I'd pick up the book myself.

GAIUS
Never mind your arms. What do I do if you get caught?

MERLIN
What would you do?

GAIUS
Well, you just make sure it doesn't happen, for both our sakes.

[Gaius goes back to treating Merlin's shoulders.]

MERLIN
Ah! I save Arthur from being killed and I end up as a servant. How is that fair?

GAIUS
I'm not sure fairness comes into it. You never know, it might be fun.

MERLIN [scoffs]
You think mucking out Arthur's horses is going to be fun? You should hear my list of duties.

GAIUS
We all have our duties. Even Arthur.

MERLIN
It must be so tough for him with all the girls and the glory.

GAIUS
He is a future king. People expect so much of him. He's under a lot of pressure.

[He presses hard on Merlin's arm.]

MERLIN
Ah! That makes two of us.

--

[04:34, GUINEVERE'S HOUSE - DAY]

GWEN
So, you've got voiders on the arms.

MERLIN
Mmhhmmm.

GWEN
The hauberk goes over your chest.

MERLIN
The chest. The arms. The chest.

GWEN
I guess you know what to do with the helmet.

MERLIN
Erm, yeah. Yeah, that was the only bit I'd figured out.

GWEN [giggles]

[Merlin puts the helmet on.]

MERLIN
How come you're so much better at this than me?

GWEN
I'm the blacksmith's daughter. I know pretty much everything there is to know about armour, which is actually kind of sad.

MERLIN
No, it's brilliant!

--

[05:12, EXT. TRAINING GROUNDS - DAY]

ARTHUR
You do know the tournament starts today?

MERLIN
Yes, Sire.

[Merlin fixes the buckle on the gorget.]

MERLIN
You nervous?

ARTHUR
I don't get nervous.

MERLIN
Really? I thought everyone got nervous.

ARTHUR
Will you shut up!

[Merlin grabs Arthur's cape, ties it on him, and hands Arthur his helmet.]

MERLIN
Great, yeah. I think you're all set.

ARTHUR
Aren't you forgetting something? My sword.

MERLIN
Oh, yeah. Yeah, sorry. Guess, uh, you'll be needing that.

[Arthur grabs the sword and marches off.]

MERLIN
That went well.

--

[06:08, TOURNAMENT GROUNDS - DAY] [Guinevere and Morgana sit excitedly in the stands of the tournament grounds as the competitors enter the arena. Merlin peeks around the entrance as Uther struts past the front line of knights]

UTHER
Knights of the realm, it's a great honour to welcome you to a tournament at Camelot. Over the next three days, you will come to put your bravery to the test, your skills as warriors, and of course, to challenge the reigning champion, my son, Prince Arthur. Only one can have the honour of being crowned champion, and he will receive a prize of 1,000 gold pieces.

[A box is opened revealing the gold.]

UTHER
It is in combat that we learn a knight's true nature, whether he is indeed a warrior or a coward. The tournament begins!

[Crowd cheers. The knights exit the arena. Uther stops by Arthur on his way to the stands and speaks to him in a low voice.]

UTHER
I trust you will make me proud.

[Uther slaps his back. Guards take Arthur and the other knight's capes, and they put on helmets. The crowd cheers and Guinevere whoops. Arthur and the knight fight.]

MERLIN
Yeah! Come on!

[Arthur wins and the crowd cheers.]

MERLIN
Yeah!

[Valiant wins his bout. Meanwhile, other knights compete. Arthur and Merlin watch Valiant fighting.]

MERLIN
Knight Valiant looks pretty handy with a sword.

[Valiant exits the arena and stops near Arthur.]

VALIANT
May I offer my congratulations on your victories today?

ARTHUR
Likewise.

VALIANT
I hope to see you at the reception this evening.

[Valiant leaves with his servant.]

MERLIN
Creep.

ARTHUR [snorts]

MERLIN [snorts]

ARTHUR
Uh, for tomorrow you need to repair my shield, wash my tunic, clean my boots, sharpen my sword, and polish my chainmail.

--

[10:11, MERLIN'S CHAMBER]

GAIUS
Are you using magic again?

MERLIN
No.

GAIUS
What's all this, then?

MERLIN [shrugs]

GAIUS
I just came to tell you that supper's ready.

--

[10:39, THRONE ROOM - DAY]

VALIANT
Knight Valiant of the Western Isles, My Lord.

UTHER
I saw you fighting today. You have a very aggressive style.

VALIANT
Well, as My Lord said, "To lose is to be disgraced."

UTHER
I couldn't agree more. Knight Valiant, may I present the Lady Morgana, my ward.

[Valiant bows to kiss Morgana's hand while Arthur looks on with a wry grin.]

VALIANT
My Lady.

MORGANA
I saw you competing today.

VALIANT
I saw you watching. I understand the tournament champion has the honour of escorting My Lady to the feast.

MORGANA
That's correct.

VALIANT
Then I will give everything to win the tournament.

[She smiles and nods to him, he nods back.]

VALIANT
My Lady.

[Valiant walks over to shake hands with other knights, Morgana and Guinevere watch him. Arthur bows to his father.]

UTHER
Arthur.

ARTHUR
Father.

[Arthur looks over at Valiant before walking to Morgana.]

MORGANA
They all seem rather impressed by Knight Valiant.

ARTHUR
They're not the only ones.

MORGANA
You're not jealous, are you?

ARTHUR
I don't see there's anything to be jealous of.

[Morgana's smile fades. Arthur walks on.]

MORGANA [to Guinevere, in a low voice]
Could Arthur be any more annoying? I so hope Knight Valiant wins the tournament.

GUINEVERE
You don't really mean that.

MORGANA
Yes, I do.

--

[11:58, ARMOURY]

MERLIN
Hello? Is there someone there?

[Merlin finds Valiant's shield and sees one of the snake eyes blink. he moves to touch it when someone puts a sword to his chest. Merlin gets up.]

VALIANT
Can I help you with something, boy?

MERLIN
Nope. I'm good. I, I was just... I was, erm, gathering my master's armour.

VALIANT
Then you'd best be on your way.

MERLIN
Right, yeah. No problem.

[Merlin picks up the armour and stumbles on his way out.]

--

[13:00, ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS]

ARTHUR
You did all this on your own?

MERLIN
Yes, Sire.

ARTHUR
Now let's see if you can get me into it without forgetting anything.

[Merlin puts on Arthur's hauberk and surcoat, followed by the gorget, vambraces, pauldron, and couter. Next, his mail coif, belt, sword belt, dagger, and sword. Merlin hands Arthur his helmet.]

ARTHUR
That was much better. Not that it could have got any worse.

MERLIN
I'm a fast learner.

ARTHUR
I hope, for you sake, that's true.

MERLIN
Good luck.

--

[13:53, EXT. TOURNAMENT GROUNDS - DAY]

GAIUS
Is it my imagination, or are you beginning to enjoy yourself?

MERLIN
It... [sighs] It isn't totally horrible all the time.

[Arthur fights his opponent.]

MERLIN
Yes! [claps]

[Valiant fights in the arena. He knocks down Sir Ewan, whose helm rolls off. Valiant pins him down with his shield.]

VALIANT
Strike him.

[Serpents come out of shield.]

VALIANT
Strike him!

[Serpent bites Sir Ewan. Valiant hits him and stands up. Crowd cheers. Arthur and Merlin see Sir Ewan lying motionless on the ground.]

MERLIN
I think he's badly hurt.

[Gaius enters the arena with his medical bag.]

--

[15:38, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]


MERLIN
How is he?

GAIUS
It's most odd. Look at this. See these two small wounds. Looks like a snake bite.

Merlin
How could he've been bitten by a snake? He was injured in the sword fight.

GAIUS
But the symptoms are consistent with poisoning: slow pulse, fever, paralysis.

MERLIN
Can you heal him?

GAIUS
Well, if it is a snake bite, I'll have to extract venom from the snake that bit him to make an antidote.

MERLIN
What happens if he doesn't get the antidote?

GAIUS
Then I'm afraid there's nothing more I can do for him. He's going to die.

MERLIN
He was fighting Knight Valiant.

GAIUS
What's that?

MERLIN
Nothing.

--

[16:27, VALIANT'S GUEST CHAMBERS]

VALIANT
Dinner time. Come on.

[Valiant feeds it to the snakes in the shield. Merlin scurries away, but Valiant hears him and follows. Merlin hides in an alcove of the Criss-cross Corridor and Valiant gives up the chase.]

--

[17:29, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

MERLIN
I've just seen one of the snakes in Valiant's shield come alive. He's using magic.

GAIUS
Are you sure?

MERLIN
The snake ate a mouse - one swallow, straight down. Sir Ewan was fighting Valiant when he collapsed. It must've been one of the snakes from the shield. I have to tell Arthur.

GAIUS
Is there any chance you might be mistaken?

MERLIN
I know magic when I see it.

GAIUS
Perhaps, but have you any proof?

MERLIN
Don't you believe me?

GAIUS
I fear you'll land yourself in trouble. How will you explain why you were in Valiant's chambers?

MERLIN
What does that matter? He's using magic to cheat in the tournament!

GAIUS
But you can't go accusing a knight of using magic without proof. The King would never accept the word of servant over the word of a knight.

MERLIN
What? So what I say doesn't count for anything?

GAIUS
I'm afraid it counts for very little as far as the King is concerned. That's the way it is.

--

[18:46, TRAINING GROUNDS/TOURNAMENT GROUNDS]

MERLIN
You're telling me you've got to fight that?

ARTHUR
Yes, and he's strong as a bear. But he's slow.

MERLIN
Ah, and you're fast.

ARTHUR
Exactly.

[Merlin finishes helping Arthur with his armour. Morgana absently strokes Guinevere's cloak in the stands.]

GWEN
You're not worried, are you?

MORGANA
No.

[Merlin sees Valiant put down his shield. Gaius approaches Merlin.]

GAIUS
How're you getting on?

MERLIN
Fine. Just doing my job. Minding my own business.

[Arthur fights the bear knight and wins. Valiant wins his next match. Merlin and Gaius look at the final brackets.]

MERLIN
Valiant's going to fight Arthur in the final. He'll use the shield to kill him.

--

[20:58, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS
Merlin, about what I said yesterday... Look, Uther wouldn't really listen to you or me, but you are right. We can't let Valiant get away with this.

MERLIN
But we don't have any proof.

GAIUS
Well, if we could cure Ewan, he could tell the King that Valiant was using magic. The King would believe another knight. But how we get the antidote...Well, that's another matter.

[Merlin gets up and leaves.]

GAIUS
Merlin?

--

[21:48, COUNCIL CHAMBERS]

KNIGHTS
Long live Valiant!

UTHER
So Valiant, do you think you stand a chance of defeating my son?

VALIANT
He is a great warrior, My Lord. I do hope to be a worthy opponent.

[Merlin peeks into the Council Chamber.]

UTHER
You should stay in Camelot after the tournament. I could do with more knights like you.

VALIANT
I'd be honoured, My Lord.

--

[VALIANT'S GUEST CHAMBERS]

MERLIN
[casts a spell]

[The door unlocks. Merlin enters and takes a sword from a rack, approaching the shield. Merlin turns to the door when he hears someone approaching. a snake slithers out of the shield and poises to strike. Merlin sees the shadow of the snake and turns around to cut off its head. the other snakes come out, but Merlin drops the sword, grabs the first snake head and runs out of the room.]

--

[23:33, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS
I'll get started preparing the antidote.

MERLIN
I'm going to tell Arthur.

GAIUS
You'll need this.

[Gaius hands Merlin the snake head.]

GAIUS
And Merlin, what you did was very brave.

--

[23:52, ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS]

ARTHUR [sceptically]
You? You chopped its head off?

MERLIN
Ewan was bitten by a snake from the shield when he was fighting Valiant. You can talk to Gaius, you can see the puncture wounds in Ewan's neck where the snake bit him. Ewan was beating him, he had to cheat.

ARTHUR
Valiant wouldn't dare use magic in Camelot.

MERLIN
Ewan was pinned under Valiant's shield. No one could see the snake bite him.

ARTHUR
I don't like the guy, but that doesn't mean he's cheating.

MERLIN
Gaius is preparing an antidote to the snake venom. When Ewan's conscious, he'll tell you what happened. If you fight Valiant in the final, he'll use the shield. It's the only way he can beat you. Look at it!

[Merlin picks up the snake head.]

MERLIN
Have you ever seen any snakes like this in Camelot?

[Arthur takes the snake head and looks it over.]

MERLIN
I know I'm just a servant and my word doesn't count for anything. I wouldn't lie to you.

ARTHUR
I want you to swear to me what you're telling me is true.

MERLIN
I swear it's true.

ARTHUR
Then I believe you.

--

[24:55, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS
Welcome back.

EWAN
There was a snake on his shield. It came alive.

GAIUS
You're weak. The snake's venom is still in your system.

EWAN
I must warn Arthur.

GAIUS
Arthur already knows. He's requested an audience with the King. Now, they'll want to talk to you. Rest. You'll need your strength. I need to fetch more herbs. I'll be right back.

[Snake slithers to Ewan's bed and strikes him.]

--

[26:08, COUNCIL CHAMBER]

UTHER
Why have you summoned the court?

ARTHUR
I believe Knight Valiant is using a magic shield to cheat in the tournament.

UTHER
Valiant, what do you have to say to this?

VALIANT
My Lord, this is ridiculous. I've never used magic. Does your son have any evidence to support this outrageous accusation?

UTHER
Do you have evidence?

ARTHUR
I do.

[Arthur motions for Merlin to come forward. Merlin hands Uther the snake head.]

--

[26:36, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS
I'm afraid this potion tastes like toad water, but it'll get you back on your feet. Ewan?

[Gaius checks for Ewan's pulse.]

--

[26:50, COUNCIL CHAMBER]

UTHER
Let me see this shield.

MERLIN [whispers to Arthur]
Don't let him get too close.

ARTHUR
Be careful, My Lord.

[Arthur draws his sword. Uther inspects the shield. Gaius enters the room.]

GAIUS [whispers]
Merlin.

ARTHUR [whispers]
We need Ewan. Find out what's happening.

[Merlin nods.]

VALIANT
As you can see, My Lord, it's just an ordinary shield.

ARTHUR
He's not going to let everyone see the snakes come alive.

UTHER
Then how am I to know that what you say is true?

ARTHUR
I have a witness. Knight Ewan was bitten by one of the snakes from the shield. Its venom made him grievously ill, however, he has received an antidote. He will confirm that Knight Valiant is using magic.

UTHER
Where is this witness?

ARTHUR
He should be here...

[Arthur turns to Gaius and Merlin.]

ARTHUR
Where's Ewan?

MERLIN
He's dead.

UTHER
I'm waiting!

ARTHUR
I'm afraid the witness is dead.

UTHER
So you have no proof to support these allegations. Have you seen Valiant using magic?

ARTHUR
No. But my servant fought one of the snakes from...

UTHER
Your servant? You made these outrageous accusations against a knight on the word of your servant?

ARTHUR
I believe he's telling the truth!

VALIANT
My Lord, am I really to be judged on some hearsay from a boy?

MERLIN
I've seen those snakes come alive!

UTHER
How dare you interrupt?! Guards!

[Guards begin taking Merlin away.]

VALIANT
My Lord.

UTHER
Wait!

VALIANT
I'm sure he was merely mistaken. I wouldn't want him punished on my account.

UTHER
You see? This is how a true knight behaves - with gallantry and honour.

VALIANT
My Lord, if your son made these accusations because he's afraid to fight me, then I will graciously accept his withdrawal.

UTHER
Is this true? Do you wish to withdraw from the tournament?

ARTHUR
No!

UTHER
Then what am I to make of these allegations?

ARTHUR
Obviously there has been a misunderstanding. I withdraw the allegation against Knight Valiant. Please accept my apology.

VALIANT
Accepted.

--

[29:51, ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS]

ARTHUR
I believed you, I trusted you, and you made me look a complete fool.

MERLIN
I know it didn't go exactly to plan.

ARTHUR
"Didn't go to plan"?! My father and the entire royal court think I'm a coward! YOU HUMILIATED ME!

MERLIN
We can still expose Valiant.

ARTHUR
I no longer require your services.

MERLIN
You're sacking me?

ARTHUR
I need a servant I can trust.

MERLIN
You can trust me!

ARTHUR
And look where it got me this time. Get out of my sight!

--

[30:57, DRAGON'S CAVE]

MERLIN
Where are you? I just came to tell you: whatever you think my destiny, whatever it is you think I'm supposed to do, you've got the wrong person! That's it. Goodbye.

KILGHARRAH
If only it were so easy to escape one's destiny.

MERLIN
How can it be my destiny to protect someone who hates me?

KILGHARRAH
A half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole. Very soon you shall learn that.

MERLIN
Oh, great. Just what I needed, another riddle.

KILGHARRAH
That your and Arthur's path lies together is but the truth.

MERLIN
What is that supposed to mean?

KILGHARRAH
You know, young warlock, this is not the end. It is the beginning.

MERLIN
Just give me a straight answer!

--

[31:50, MAIN SQUARE]

GUINEVERE
Hello, Merlin.

MERLIN
All right?

[Guinevere sits next to him.]

GUINEVERE
Is it true what you said about Valiant using magic?

[Merlin nods.]

GUINEVERE
What are you going to do?

MERLIN
Why does everyone seem to think it's down to me to do something about it?

GUINEVERE
Because it is! Isn't it? You have to show everyone that you were right and they were wrong.

MERLIN
And how do I do that?

GUINEVERE
I don't know.

[Merlin catches sight of a dog statue.]

MERLIN
That's it.

GUINEVERE
Where are you going?

MERLIN
Do you have a wheelbarrow?

--

[32:48, GAIUS' CHAMBERS]

GAIUS
What are you doing with that?

MERLIN
I'm going to let everyone see the snakes for themselves.

[Merlin puts the statue in his chamber and pull the magic book out from under a floor board.]

MERLIN
"Bebay odothay. Bebay odothay arisan quickum."

[Merlin tries out the spell]

MERLIN
Bebay odothay arisan quickum. Bebay odothay arisan quickum.

--

[33:35, MORGANA'S CHAMBER]

MORGANA [whispers]
Arthur!

[Morgana gets up and goes to the window to watch Arthur practicing in the Square below.]

--

[34:00, MERLIN'S ROOM]

[Merlin tries the spell over and over but nothing happens.]

--

[34:16, ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS]

ARTHUR
I thought I told you to get out of my sight.

MERLIN
Don't fight Valiant in the tournament tomorrow. He'll use the shield against you.

ARTHUR
I know.

MERLIN
Then withdraw. You have to withdraw.

ARTHUR
Don't you understand? I can't withdraw. The people expect their prince to fight. How can I lead men into battle if they think I'm a coward?

MERLIN
Valiant will kill you. If you fight, you die.

ARTHUR
Then I die.

MERLIN
How can you go out there and fight like that?

ARTHUR
Because I have to. It's my duty.

--

[35:12, MERLIN'S ROOM.] [Merlin wakes early the next morning with the spell book in his lap, and speaks drowsily.]

MERLIN
Bebay odothay... arisan quickum.

[Valiant sharpens his sword near the tournament grounds. Arthur stands in the arena and looks around.]

--

[35:38, ARTHUR'S CHAMBERS]

MORGANA
Let me.

[She fixes the strap for the gorget and tightens the vambrace.]

MORGANA
I used to help my father with his armour.

[She hands him his helmet.]

ARTHUR
Thanks.

[Arthur turns to leave.]

MORGANA
Arthur, be careful.

[Arthur nods.]

ARTHUR
See you at the feast.

--

[36:47, TOURNAMENT GROUNDS]

--

[37:40, MERLIN'S ROOM]

MERLIN
Bebay odothay arisan quickum.

[There's a growl, but Merlin keeps repeating the spell.]

MERLIN
Bebay odothay arisan quickum.

[The Rottweiler barks.]

MERLIN
I did it!

[The dog starts lunging at Merlin, he rushes out of the room and shuts the door. Gaius enters.]

GAIUS
Arthur's fighting Valiant!

MERLIN
I know. I'm on my way. Oh, whatever you do, don't go into my room. We'll deal with it later.

[Gaius peeks into Merlin's room and the Rottweiler barks at him.]

--

[38:34, TOURNAMENT GROUNDS]

[Arthur fights Valiant. Arthur knocks Valiant's helmet off. Arthur removes his helmet and they both pull down their mail coifs. Valiant knocks Arthur to the ground and steps on his shield. Valiant disarms Arthur, but Arthur catches him before he can strike. Valiant pins Arthur against a wall, but Arthur shoves him off and Merlin takes the opportunity]

MERLIN
Bebay odothay arisan quickum.

[The snakes come out of the shield. The crowd stands up in surprise.]

VALIANT
What are you doing? I didn't summon you!

UTHER
He is using magic.

ARTHUR
And now they see you for what you really are.

VALIANT
[chuckles]

[Valiant sends the snakes to the ground.]

VALIANT
Kill him!

[Arthur backs up toward the stands and Morgana grabs a the sword from the knight sitting next to her and throws it to Arthur.]

MORGANA
Arthur!

[Arthur catches it, swings at Valiant and then kills the snakes. Arthur disarms Valiant and runs him through.]

ARTHUR
It's looks like I'll be going to the feast after all.

[Valiant drops and the crowd cheers. Arthur slaps Merlin's shoulder on his way out of the tournament grounds.]

--

[41:46, BANQUET HALL]

UTHER
My honourable guests, I give you Prince Arthur, your champion.

[The court applauds and Arthur offers Morgana his arm.]

ARTHUR
My Lady.

[Morgana curtsies.]

MORGANA
My champion.

MERLIN
See, I told you he gets all the girls and the glory.

GAIUS
And he owes it all to you.

MORGANA
Has your father apologised yet for not believing you?

ARTHUR
He'll never apologise. I hope, uh, you're not disappointed Valiant's not escorting you.

MORGANA
Turns out he wasn't really champion material.

ARTHUR
That was some tournament final.

MORGANA
Tell me about it. It's not every day a girl gets to save her prince.

ARTHUR
Uh, I wouldn't say I needed exactly saving. I'm sure I would've thought of something.

MORGANA
So you're too proud to admit you were saved by a girl.

ARTHUR
Because I wasn't.

MORGANA
You know what? I wish Valiant was escorting me.

ARTHUR
Me too. Then I wouldn't have to listen to you.

MORGANA
Fine!

ARTHUR
Fine.

[Morgana storms off to talk to Guinevere. Arthur turns to Merlin.]

ARTHUR
Can you believe Morgana? She says she saved me. Like I needed any help. I wanted to say I made a mistake. It was unfair to sack you.

MERLIN
No, don't worry about it. Buy me a drink and call it even.

ARTHUR
Uh, I can't be seen to be buying drinks for my servant.

MERLIN
Your servant? You sacked me.

ARTHUR
Now I'm rehiring you.

MERLIN
[snorts]

ARTHUR
My chambers are a complete mess. My clothes need washing. My, uh, armour needs repairing. My boots need cleaning. My dogs need exercising. My fireplace needs sweeping. My bed needs changing. And someone needs to muck out my stables.

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